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What to say when people make fun of your ears

Clever comebacks when people make fun of your ears

Ask Bryn

Hi Bryn,

People make fun of my ears, and I have been called Dumbo, Elf, and Mr. Spock. The worst insult is I look like Jar Jar Binks. Do you have a good comeback I can use?

Andy, Manchester

Hi Andy,

It can be difficult when someone makes fun of your ears, nose, or whatever body part. The thing is all of us have something that isn’t perfect about us.

If you are mortified by your ears, believe it or not, there are solutions. Larger ears can actually be reduced with ear sculpting surgery. The doctor reshapes your ear by removing unnecessary skin and unwanted cartilage.

I used to work with an Irish flight attendant who hated how her ears stuck out. She had been teased mercilessly in her younger years and decided she had had enough.

Maria had surgery to have her ears pinned back. I remember looking at her during recovery, and she looked like a mummy with bandages wrapped around her head. It was a small price to pay because the results were amazing. Something that had bothered her for years was resolved, and she had perfect ears afterward.

If people are making fun of you, here are a few comebacks you can use which will hopefully shut the person up for good.


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Vote for the best comeback when people make fun of your ears

I would try to insult you, but I am afraid I will not do as well as nature did.
Coming from the person who has a face not even a mother could love.
Are you always a jerk or just when I am around?
Beauty is skin deep, but ugly is to the bone.
Please, you look like something I drew with my left hand.

Michael Phelps was bullied for his big ears

Michael Phelps via Wikipedia.

Legendary athlete, Michael Phelps, was bullied relentlessly for his big ears and teased because of his long arms and lisp. After becoming an Olympic champion winning 8 medals, all those kids who used to tease him wanted to be his friend.  Even though it was challenging at the time, Phelps didn’t let the bullying hold him back and he went on to achieve great things.

More comebacks you might like

The role of counselling and self-care

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When you are dealing with someone who says that you have big ears and you find it stressful, consider getting support from a professional. Talking to a counselor is a great way to work through a challenging situation, and help you find some strategies to work through the person’s behaviour.

Better Help is a great resource where you can talk to a counselor from the comfort of your own home.

Taking care of your own needs isn’t selfish, and you will feel better in the long run.

Got any comments, questions or tips for dealing for dealing with someone who says that you have big ears? Share them in the comments below.


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9 Responses

  1. Hey there

    I tend to get bullied at times for having bigger ears. Hav read ur comebacks above but cn u suggest comebacks that i may use when handling some imp client or say a superior.


    1. Hi, a couple of things you could say:

        Did you mean to be so rude?

        Thank you for pointing out the obvious.

        Thanks for pointing that out Captain Obvious.

        You don’t say.

      It is tricky at work because you do want to keep your job.

      Good luck!


      1. You’ve really helped me out, go see my other comment it’s the 3rd comment after this one (other than the replies, if there are any)
        Bye Jax

    2. Hi Khurram,

      A good reply is to make the difference they are commenting on, into your superpower difference over them. Like, Oh yeah, my clients say I’m one of the best listeners, my ears help give them superior tailored results they feel properly heard. I wouldn’t trade that for anything.

      If clients comment you could say, it such a gift being a good listener, I wouldn’t trade it for anything.


  2. Hi Jax,
    You sound so nice, you did really help me out with some problems. Do yo think you can help me with some other things, reply and talk if you think you can help me out. Bye Jax

  3. I have long ears (vertically). Not the protuding/ cup handle.
    You just got to shrug it off, it’s not a defect. You aren’t broken, but maybe the universes toilet is as the world is full of assholes waiting it seems sometimes. Assholes are assholes and they would make fun of anything to try to make themselves feel better by trolling you to amusement of others to give amusement to self. (it’s THE pre-internet ego stroke)

    t’ll be harshest in Jr. High/Highschool to stand out no matter what it is. Any adult who hasn’t gotten used to diversity is an utter has been loser and would likely be eaten alive in being made fun of for being “old” by the coyote pups. Anything is up for grabs.

    One defense I remember when a comment made on my ears ,I’d say they sure are and it’s because God hates me so much he decided I needed surround sound to really soak in the shit coated soundwaves of nobodies like you.

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