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Top Ten Comebacks for Bullies

Check out our comebacks that SHUT BULLIES UP. | www.ishouldhavesaid.net

There is nothing worse than a bully; a bully is really a coward, who gangs up with others to torment people. Bullies pick innocent victims who have done nothing to deserve the harassment being directed towards them.

Sometimes the bully has a halo effect even though they are a real jerk and the teachers and the school think that they are a great kid. These are the hard ones to catch, like the captain of the football team who has the support of the school and the students.

If you are being bullied, please tell a trusted adult what is going on so they can get you some help. The person you talk to does not have to be your parent but someone who can help you figure out what to do.

You may feel like you are being left out or picked on at school, but it won’t be like this forever. Great things are ahead for you in the future.

In the meantime, may all the bad karma that bullies inflict on others come back and bite them in the ass.

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Ever feel like you just don’t know how to speak up for yourself? Our Stand Up for Yourself the Easy Way Guide will show you how to do it in just 3 simple steps. It’s a game changer–get it free for a limited time!

Top ten comebacks for bullies

  1. If that’s your sense of humour you should prepare to get canceled pretty soon.
  2. Pleae cancel my subscription to your issues.
  3. You should really come with a warning label.
  4. Just because you’re angry doesn’t give you the right to be cruel.
  5. Breaking news just in: You’re an jerk!
  6. Too bad you can’t Photoshop your ugly personality.
  7. Thank you for your brilliant portrayal of a self-centered jerk in the movie of my life.
  8. I finally got the last knife of the set you’ve been stabbing in my back all these years. Heads up: I re gift.
  9. Thanks for teaching me how sick and cruel a person can be.
  10. It’s impressive that you’re flexible enough to have your foot in your mouth and head up your ass at the same time.
When a bully doesn't like you, it is one less person you have to be nice to.

Entrepreneur Elon Musk was Bullied Growing up

Some kids get bullied for being different, they are creative, smart and not afraid to have a point of view.

Steve Jurvetson – https://www.flickr.com/photos/jurvetson/18659265152/

Elon Musk was one of those kids, he was bullied horribly during his school days in South Africa.

Maye Musk said of her son “he was the youngest and smallest guy in his school” and that he was picked on all the time.

“It’s pretty rough in South Africa,” he says. “If you’re getting bullied, you still have to go to school. You just have to get up in the morning and go. He hated it so much.” -Elon’s brother, Kimbal Musk

If so, tell that kid the story of Elon Musk. Today, the world knows Musk as a wealthy, imaginative genius — the man who is making electric cars mainstream and putting rockets in space.

Musk survived the bullying with the support of his family, and having the belief he could do great things. The other thing that saved him was computers and creating businesses.

Today he is known as one of the founders of PayPal and the founder of Tesla.

WANT TO BE ABLE TO SPEAK UP FOR YOURSELF?

Ever feel like you just don’t know how to speak up for yourself? Our Stand Up for Yourself the Easy Way Guide will show you how to do it in just 3 simple steps. It’s a game changer–get it free for a limited time!

Best comebacks for bullies

If you are being bullied, do not let it define your future. You are capable of accomplishing amazing things. Elon overcame horrendous bullying and showed all of the haters what he is capable of.

More comebacks you might like

Got any comments, questions or tips for dealing with someone who bullies others? Share them in the comments below.

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75 Responses

  1. I have been being bullied since the beginning of this school year and I really need snappy comebacks for when she does or says something to me. I am not allowed to swear so I need a clean but smart alec come back.

    1. Hey Mahayla,

      The comebacks below are not too rude. I also like this one for mean girls: Too bad you can’t Photoshop your ugly personality.

      You would be much more likable if it wasn’t for that hole in your mouth that noise comes out of.
      Where’s your off button?
      If you’re waiting for me to care, you better pack a lunch. It’s going to be a while.
      Unless your name is Google stop acting like you know everything.
      You should use glue stick instead of Chap Stick.
      I’ve been called worse by better.
      I don’t hate you, I’m just simply not excited about your existence.
      Is your drama going to have an intermission soon?
      Have a nice day, somewhere else.
      You should come with a warning label.

      There is nothing worse than a bully. I hope things get better for you soon. 🙂

      1. Hey I have1good come back:roses are red violets are blue Any mean thing you say bounces off me and goes back to you

        1. Good one I like that one so I’m going to say roses are red and violets are blue I got ten fingers and the middle one is for you

    2. Just repeat everything she says to you, but say “your face is” before it.
      Your stupid = your face is stupid
      That doesn’t make sense = your face doesn’t make sense
      Your clothes don’t match = your face don’t match
      Your hair is outdated = your face is outdated.

      Get it. It’s fun and they don’t get the better of you.
      Good Luck

      1. nah, you gotta reply with “i know you like to think that everything is about you but in reality none of us give a hot doody” then snarkily smile and either walk away or focus yourself on something and just ignore them

        1. Another good comeback for narcissist is the world revolves around the sun, not you.
          Or you can’t see how beautiful the world is because you think you are the world.
          Or (here’s one from pitch perfect) get your head out of your ass, it’s not a hat.

    3. hiya i have a 2 comebacks
      *if they call you a bitch* reply with ~ takes one to know one.

      *they be being rude* ohh sorry what do you have on your face… is that uuggllyyyy.

    4. Mahayla, me and my brother have grown up with bullies heres a few of our faveoruite comebacks form over the years

      well if she says you wear too much or little make up you can say its a shame that make up cant make (insert her name) more butiful maybe try eating it

      Or if they beat you up tell them karma is a butt who gave them a hot chocolate fudge cake of good things but that it foregot to add nice personailty to the recipe making the whole thing taste off

      or you could say your ass must get real jelous cuz all your mouth does is talk shit but conisidering your mother only eats shit its a good thing

    5. “At least im not as shallow as you”
      that is one my mum said to me cause im being bullied as well and its working me so far

    6. Hey there! I was also been bullied in my first grades by some jerky boys. They called me fat although everyone else knew that I was normal. Here are some comebacks from me for you:
      You’re not cool! Answer: Being cool is nothing if you’re an idiot.
      You’re fat. Answer: You must be just a piece of string to call me like that.
      Cash me outside! Answer: Well, I’m gonna cash you inside. How ’bout that?
      Everyone hates you. Answer: I don’t care ’cause I love myself.
      You’re crazy! Answer: Yes I’m insane, but you’re the same!
      You’re so stupid! Answer: But at least I don’t talk trash.
      You’re so rude! Answer: The only difference that I use my rudeness on purpose, but yours just drip!
      You’re a bitch! Answer: Yes I am, but I’m a bad one.
      You’re so bossy! Answer: Some say I’m bossy ’cause I am the boss!

    7. Hi!That person that’s bully should go and die in a hole.Because I can only tell you one thing…You are great and just ignore her.

    8. Hello Mahayla, I like to use this comeback a lot.
      If they ever call you a nerd just say : I may be a nerd but I’m just trying to make sure that I won’t be working in McDonald’s with you in the future. Or : Be nice to nerds, chances are you’ll end up working for one.

  2. Sorry I can’t here you your head is to far up ass btw I know what it is like to be bullied so I have used this comeback 1 or 2 times

    1. If he is your boyfriend and doesn’t want to kiss you, you should dump him. I also found this documentary that what most men crave more then anything is to be needed, you could say I’ve realized that to be happy in my life I need you, idk if this is true, but it seems pretty true to me. If he doesn’t love you, there are so many people who you could be with. Don’t waste your time on him. Tell him I no longer see u as someone I love, but I pity you because the world is so beautiful, but you can’t see it because you think you are the world. You could also use this comeback for other things. If u decide to break up with him, you could look up good roasts to dump him. Also sorry this comment is so long lol

    1. Yes but that’s a gay one unlike-Being a dick doesn’t make yours any bigger! XD I found that one worked really well and left the Billie speechless and everyone laughing at the bullie

  3. Threw out my life i have been embarsed from ppl bullying me, but now who ever bullies me, prepare them to about to be embarrased. Assholes! Sorry to brake the news bud but acting like a dic wont make yours any bigger, wait……….. you dont have 1!!!

  4. if anyone is bullying you and you say look in a mirror then the common come back is I can’t u already broke it just say yeh I’m really sorry but I was just trying to protect you from your own ugliness and if they say look at your self say I can’t cuz I broke the mirror for you safety remember?

    1. Hi Katja,

      If you are constantly being picked on you should tell a teacher or an adult who can help you. I am not sure what grade you are in, but sometimes kids need help sorting out situations.

      Comebacks you can use at school:
      https://ishouldhavesaid.net/2013/12/top-ten-comebacks-kids-can-use-at-school/

      For Mean girls:
      https://ishouldhavesaid.net/2013/06/top-ten-snappy-comebacks-for-mean-girls/

      Check out our top ten lists for lots of great comebacks:
      https://ishouldhavesaid.net/top-ten/

      Be prepared for a verbal bully:
      https://ishouldhavesaid.net/2014/09/be-prepared-for-a-verbal-bully/

      Bryn

  5. I saw someone I have not seen in years and they were so rude I couldn’t believe it. I truly hope I don’t see them again, but if I do I am going to use one of these comebacks.

    1. Listen to the song Paper Doll by Bea Miller, u can use some of the lyrics there, “is it true hurt people hurt people?” “Does it make you feel tall to make me feel small?” Hope this helps!!

  6. There’s this couple at my school. They pick on me and my friends. We’ve reported it to the school several times but when they come up to us we need some good comebacks. Any help?
    Thankyou

    1. Ali, see if any of these work for you:

      If you’re waiting for me to care, you better pack a lunch. It’s gonna be a while.

      You would be much more likable if it wasn’t for that hole in your mouth that noise comes out of.

      Is your drama going to have an intermission soon?

      Check out our top ten lists:

      https://ishouldhavesaid.net/top-ten/

      Jax

      Jax

  7. I’m really happy to know that most people posting on here are helping out others with problems, most of the time you need to tell an adult but in the mean time saying this isnt going to be bad “if this how you want to look back on yourself in 20 years fine but at least I’m not going to look back remembering I was a bully.” And after that to shut them up more just say “grow up.”

    1. Ok berry this guy sounds like a total loser (do tell him I said that!!! ) now tell him : at least I’m not going to look back on my life in 20 years remembering I was a big-mouthed bully who couldn’t find anything better to do than make other people feel bad well try to

  8. I’ve always believed that when people are mean to you or the people you care for, they’re doing you the favour of telling you exactly what sort of person they are. A little like the hideous health warnings on cigarettes in Australia. And this has saved me a lot of time that I otherwise would have wasted talking to them. Thanks for the website, Bryn.

  9. some boys at my school run away from me and call me rabies and they tease one of my friends about having glasses. but I don’t want to tell the school cause they will make a whole big deal out of it. and I don’t want to say anything to them cause one of my friends is going out with one of them!!!!

    1. About the glasses, say, “Are you sure glasses are a bad thing? Because they help us see that you guys are idiots”

    2. You could joke that they have a crush on you and your friend. A lot of the time when boys tease girls, they like them. This will make them uncomfortable and embarrassed. Hope it helps!

  10. Hey me and my brother have been bullied since starting elementary school I’m now in 7th grade and hes in 9th any one have any good comebacks for us we are running out of ideas.

    1. ok I have been using this come back a lot: so whats a difference between a egg and you? eggs get laid and you don’t

  11. Heres another comback for arrogant people.”You are the epitome of arrogance. Oh wait, I’m sorry, do I need to translate that to idiot for you? “

  12. I was told by my father once stop being Indignis. I told him using big words like that shows how unintelligent you really are.

    After all he’s my father.

  13. I have some bullies at school I have just lost a mother and I am 14 I really need a good come back to shut them up and leave me alone can anyone help?

    1. Hi Monique,

      I am sorry to hear that you lost your mom. It must be such a difficult time for you and I think it would be helpful to talk to a trusted adult about what is going on. It doesn’t have to be your Dad, somebody who can help you with the situation.

      Here are a few comebacks you can use:

      https://ishouldhavesaid.net/2013/06/top-ten-snappy-comebacks-for-mean-girls/

      https://ishouldhavesaid.net/2013/12/top-ten-comebacks-kids-can-use-at-school/

      https://ishouldhavesaid.net/2016/11/top-ten-comebacks-for-mean-girls-who-are-always-creating-drama/

      Wishing you all good things,

      Bryn

  14. Bully: your such a creepy rat, freak! GO LIVE YOUR PUNY LIFE SOMEWHERE ELSE!
    Me: Sorry. I’m not a mirrorYou must mistake a lot of people do mirrors. (Random fact: The bully bullies a lot a people, in that case, he thought many were mirrors.)

    Anyway, comebacks were great!

  15. I have one for if billies say your ugly: Have you checked the mirror wait that’s right you can’t cause you broke it.

  16. I hate people saying things about me and act like friends, these are great comebacks that I will cherish to use against their negative, rude, and snobby remarks.

  17. Someone told me that they overestimated and that I was far more stupid than anticipated. I responded with “You have a special gift: You are impossible to overestimate.”

  18. i have 2 comebacks . One is I’ll see you when you wash my car and the other one is I’ll get you back when I’m ur boss . (yes they are from the song loser like me )

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