When you get to a certain age, people start asking when you’re going to get married, especially if you have been in a long-term relationship. When people like your kind aunt Betty ask the dreaded marriage question, they usually do so with good intentions. The people who love you want to see you march down the aisle, and be part of your special day.
What Betty doesn’t realize is that you haven’t necessarily bought into the traditional paradigm that everyone needs to get married and live a traditional life. Most people in the western world graduate high school, go to college, get a job and settle down and get married. And out of that group of people who do follow the traditional life path, sure many may be happy, but it isn’t necessarily for everyone.
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25 Best comebacks when someone asks if your getting married
1. Hopefully, before I start showing!
2. We would like to know the answer to that question before you do!
3. Next week. Didn’t you get the invitation?
4. When his / her divorce is final.
5. Probably when your husband finally proposes.
6. I personally don’t really feel the need to tell the government who I’m sleeping with.
7. About the same time as my partner.
8. Every time you ask me this question, I’m going to postpone the date by one year.
9. Probably when you stop asking when we’re getting married.
10. When I feel the need to use a legal instrument to let my partner know I want to stay with her forever, instead of just words.
11. When you’re ready to pay for the reception.
12. Don’t ever expect to be privy to that information.
13. Waiting on a sign from God. Let us know if you hear anything.
14. We are happy to wait because we already feel married. Once we’re ready to commit throwing a wedding, you’ll be receiving an invitation.
15. That’s not my priority right now. Would you like to hear how my new job is going?
16. When we decide it is the right time to get married and not a moment before.
17. We’re just enjoying living in sin for a while.
18. Wow, I’m surprised you feel comfortable asking that question.
19. Thanks for asking but were are not focused on getting married right now. We want to travel and enjoy being in our twenties.
20. Thank you for your curiosity, but we’re not planning to get married at the moment.
21. It is like there is a life time clock where are soon as you’re a certain age with a partner everyone wants to know when you are getting married.
22. Marriage isn’t on our radar. Thanks for asking.
23. We appreciate you asking us, but marriage isn’t in the cards for us right now.
24. We plan to marry once the stars align, the planets align, and our budget aligns! It could be a while!
25. When we know, you will be the first person to receive an invitation.
Why do people ask if a couple is getting married?
People often ask when a couple is getting married out of social convention. Many folks look at life as a timeline: go to university, start dating someone , get married and then buy a house.
Other folks are just curious about your romance and want to know if it is serious or a temporary fling.
In many cultures, marriage is a traditional way to show commitment in a relationship. People ask because they are excited for you and want to join in your celebration.
How to deal with people asking if you are getting married
When folks ask about your marriage plans, respond in a way that works for you. Here are some ways to deal with the marriage question.
1. Try to be honest: If you feel comfortable with the person, you can share your future plans and help manage expectations of where the relationship is going.
2. Boundary up: If you feel the marriage question is an invasion of your privacy, let the person know that subject is off limits for now.
3. Thank the person: To keep the relationship positive, thank the person for their interest and concern.
4. Change the topic: If you would like to keep your relationship status quiet, change the conversation to the person you are speaking with about their own relationship.
5. Express your plans: If you want to share, let the person know your marriage plans and if they will be getting an invitation in the near future.
6. Maintain Respect: If the person has good intentions, make sure to answer in a respectful manner.
Remember that you don’t have to answer every question that is asked of you. You have the right to maintain privacy in your personal relationships.
Getting married isn’t for everyone
Society pressures people to feel like they should take the plunge and say I do, even if it isn’t the best thing for you. I have a friend who was in no rush to get married, in fact, she dated her husband for six years before they tied the knot. Her friends kept asking when she would settle down, and it even became a bit of a joke. All of Poppy’s friends who rushed into marriage are now divorced, and she is the only one of the group who is still married, the rest of the group are all single moms.
Next time someone keeps asking when you’re going to get married or tie the knot, use one of our clever comebacks.
If you want to shut up the nosy person asking you about marriage, use one of our snappy comebacks below.
More comebacks you might like
- How to answer why don’t you have kids
- Comebacks when people call you a bitch
- Read more answers to rude comments
The Role of counselling and self care
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When you are dealing with a person who asks when you’re getting married and you find it stressful, consider getting support from a professional. Talking to a counselor is a great way to work through a challenging situation, and help you find some strategies to work through the person’s behaviour.
Better Help is a great resource where you can talk to a counselor from the comfort of your own home.
Taking care of your own needs isn’t selfish, and you will feel better in the long run.
WANT TO BE ABLE TO SPEAK UP FOR YOURSELF?
Our FREE Starter Guide will show you the 3 simple steps you can take right now to stand up for yourself so that you can feel confident. It’s a game changer–get it free for a limited time!