Why does my child get teased

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Parents often ask me, “Why does my child get teased?” The truth is, all kids get teased at some point in time. I’m sure when you think back to your own childhood, you were probably teased for something, and you can remember exactly why they made fun of you.

Usually, people get teased or made fun of for something obvious, like they have a big nose or red hair or they are overweight. That is usually the first thing people will point out and make fun of. 

We all have something that we can be teased about, and how you respond will determine whether the teasing is going to stop or continue. If you get upset and overwhelmed when someone is making fun of you, then the bully will know that you’re a perfect target, who will just take their abuse.

When a kid gets visibly upset and doesn’t respond when they are picked on, the bully will double down and pick on the child even more. 

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Teach your kids to shut down teasing quickly

The worst thing a parent can do is tell their child to just take it and not to say anything back, which can lead to the teasing escalating. You are basically putting a target on your child’s back to be picked on. 

Well meaning parents often say, “Be the bigger person and don’t say anything back.” Or they tell the child to go to the teacher to help sort things out. The problem with that advice is kids tease when the teacher isn’t around.

Parents need to give their children the skills to shut down teasing right away, and you can quickly do that with verbal self defense. Verbal self defense is a skill that can be easily taught within an hour. Many adults don’t know how to stand up for themselves because they were never taught as children, and it causes them endless frustration.

We have a process that works tremendously well and that kids can learn quickly in our bundle Verbal Self Defense for Kids Made Easy.

How to stop teasing quickly

And the reason that it works is that  people just don’t know how to respond when you have an amazing comeback and they just move on to someone else. Think about it, nobody likes to be embarrassed, right? People’s brains are not wired to respond when they are caught off guard with a clever response. 

Who gets teased at school?

Kids who don’t respond or get upset are the first to be targeted. Would you tease someone who would respond with a funny reply or someone who will just take it? Obviously,  you aren’t going to pick on someone who says something clever back to you.

When you say something funny  back, they don’t know what to say, they’re going to start picking on someone else in their class.

Learning to shut down teasing is a life skill that kids can use to stand up for themselves for life. If you spend an hour teaching your child verbal self defense it can truly  be life changing.

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The Role of counselling and self care

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When you are dealing with a fake friend can be stressful, consider getting support from a professional. Talking to a counsellor is a great way to work through a challenging situation, and help you find some strategies to work through the person’s behaviour.

Better Help is a great resource where you can talk to a counselor from the comfort of your own home. 

Taking care of your own needs isn’t selfish, and you will feel better in the long run.

Do you know why your child gets teased at school

The Role of counselling and self care

I Should Have Said Media may earn a commission after clicking links on this page at no additional cost to you. Learn more.

Better Help is a great resource where you can talk to a counselor from the comfort of your own home. 

Taking care of your own needs isn’t selfish, and you will feel better in the long run.

Got any comments, questions or tips to figure out what your child get teased at school? Share them in the comments below.

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