If you are out and about and someone sends a couple of insults your way, you may be temporarily lost for words. It is always helpful to have a few great counter comebacks tucked away in your mind, so you are ready to battle at any moment.
Comebacks are kind of like verbal warfare, and there is an art form to be able to whip up an awesome, clever response quickly. To deliver an even better insult, you need to possess a quick wit and be pretty damn smart. If you don’t possess those traits, we can help you out.
If you are always picked on for a certain thing like your weight, be prepared with a few comebacks if someone calls you fat. Practice saying the comebacks until they are rolling off your tongue.
If someone slays you with a comeback, here are a few counter comebacks to say as a response.
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Top ten counter comebacks to other people’s comebacks
- I can eat alphabet soup and spit out a better reply than that.
- I’ve heard smarter things from a schizophrenic with Tourette’s.
- Your death with probably be caused by being sarcastic at the wrong time.
- Quit trying to be a smart ass when you are just an ass.
- How long did it take you to come up with that one?
- No. No. I am listening; it just takes me a moment to process so much stupid information all at once.
- I bet you were up all night trying to come up that one.
- You’re like a hemorrhoid, a pain the arse who won’t go away.
- Your village called. They said they lost their idiot.
- Your comeback was so stupid it didn’t even come back.
WANT TO BE ABLE TO SPEAK UP FOR YOURSELF?
Our FREE Starter Guide will show you the 3 simple steps you can take right now to stand up for yourself so that you can feel confident. It’s a game changer–get it free for a limited time!
Chris Rock needed a few good counter comebacks growing up
Chris Rock certainly needed to be prepared with a few counter comebacks when he was growing up in Brooklyn.
At age 13, Chris’ mom wanted him to go to a better school outside of their neighborhood. He had to take several buses to get to Brooklyn, Bensonhurst, where he was the old black student a white high school. Most of the students at Chris’ school were of Italian descent.
He suffered verbal taunts and weekly beatings from the others students. Chris needed to use his quick wit to survive in his new school to make friends and ultimately survive the bullying.
Chris developed a lot of quick wit and went on to become one of the top-ranked comedians in America. They have even made a sitcom about his life called Everybody Hates Chris.
More top ten comeback lists you might like
10 Responses
I think all of your comebacks are very useful and will be useful in the right situations. I love this website. I think another good comeback to put in this website is, “You bought your life off of Craigslist, that’s why it’s so fake.”
ooooh thats good 😀
I should use it on the person that keeps cussing out my siblings
Brooooo yess I love that one
How about, “stalk you? No ur not interesting enough”?
I’m getting bullied at school and it’s lasted 2 terms and this really helped!
Great, LOL.
This has been really helpful! I have no seat on the bus and when kids start being about it now I have something!
How about this: If I wanted someone stupid’s opinion I would go ask Siri or Google.
If someone were to say something like; “Yo, fat ass!” I’d reply with “Yeah, I’m chubby. I can lose weight though. You’re a dumbass though. I don’t think there’s a fix for that.”
this website is nice
i used it against a bully and he does not bully me anymore
thanks
When someone makes a joke about you, laughs at it, and then says: “It’s just a joke!” reply with:
“So is your life but I don’t laugh at it.”
bru that burnt so bad I feel like ash