We have all met a jerk who makes every situation difficult and never realizes that they are the problem. You don’t have to try to win over the haters; after all, you are not the jerk whisperer. Life is way too short to spend your valuable time dealing with jerks. Sometimes a jerk will have it out for you for no reason. They may verbally attack you, belittle you in public, or embarrass you.
I went to pick up my nephew from school one day. One of the parents, a 40-year-old jerk, was on the playground. I had heard about him from others, putting kids down while elevating his own kid to look better.
My nephew was applying to a high school that was challenging to get into at the time. This guy said to him, “Do you really think that you will be in the 20 percent who will get accepted?” I just couldn’t believe that an adult could be so unkind to a kid!
If you can get the jerk out of your life, do so as soon as possible. Don’t waste your precious time thinking about the idiot.

WANT TO BE ABLE TO SPEAK UP FOR YOURSELF?
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If you get tired of putting up with the jerk and their nasty behavior, here are a few snappy comebacks to let them know they need to back off.
Top ten snappy comebacks for jerks
- You have the rest of your life to be a jerk, why not take today off?
- Your comments about X are not acceptable.
- Did you mean to be so rude?
- It’s not okay with me that you comment on X. I’d like to ask you to stop.
- Time out, you can’t do that here.
- You always have something negative to add to the conversation, don’t you?
- Life is funny… people will point out what’s wrong with you but they can’t see what’s wrong with themselves.
- Let’s chat when you are in a calmer mood, I want us to find a way to communicate in a more respectful way.
- It seems like you must be going through a challenging time. I am here if you need to talk.
- Name: this thing you’ve just said to me? Unacceptable. If I hear it one more time, I will refuse to speak to you for a day. After that, it’ll be two days, and the next time, it will be doubled to four.
Be prepared next time you run into a jerk
If you have to deal with a jerk who gives you a hard time, our bundle Snappy Comebacks any Situation can help you out. Be prepared for difficult people with clever responses on your phone or device any time or anywhere.
I received this email from a jerk
This email made me laugh because this guy was such a jerk and yet he couldn’t see it.
He comes to a website with free content and then complains he has to scroll down slightly on his phone. Talk about first world problems, imagine if Mark had to walk a mile to a well to get water for his family.
It would have taken him a lot longer to find the web page to submit a comment than to scroll down past a couple of lines of text. We all have a choice of how we chose to spend time on this planet, some petty people spend their lives majoring in minor things.
Everyone has to deal with haters in their lives. I sent Mark the following message.

I should have said, “You have the rest of your life to be a jerk, why not take today off?”
They say that every bad situation contains the seed of good as well. I was thinking of ways to expand my content and Mark has just given me the idea to share emails from morons to prove a point.
Thanks, Mark!

WANT TO BE ABLE TO SPEAK UP FOR YOURSELF?
Our FREE Starter Guide will show you the 3 simple steps you can take right now to stand up for yourself so that you can feel confident. It’s a game changer–get it free for a limited time!
More top ten comeback lists you might like
Justin Timberlake had to deal with a lot of jerks in high school

Singer Justin Timberlake wasn’t so popular growing up because he preferred music to football and in the state of Tennessee, where he grew up, that just wasn’t considered cool. He’s pretty popular with the ladies now, but he reveals he was picked on all the time at school and he had I had terrible acne and weird hair. When Justin was on the Ellen Dengeneres show he said, “The thing about life … is …… is … everything … you feel makes you weird is essentially what’s gonna make you sexy as an adult…. When you’re a kid I think you try so hard to fit in and when you get older you realize that fitting in isn’t really the thing that’s more interesting…. I would not be here if I would have listened to the kids who told me I was a terrible singer and I was a sissy…. Be different.”

61 Responses
Or oh, you think you know everything? Well here is something you don’t know, you’re annoying.
Your lame
I used one of those on my mean annoying sister and she littarly asked me where I heard that and she actually stoped annoying me
Ur username is lame ‘mom’
We’ll stop being mean. No one likes you that way
Wow
I got one roses are red violets are blue I got ten fingers and the middle one is for you
The middle ones. Sorry. I correct ppl too much. Just wanted to point out also ppl have 8 fingers and two thumbs. I’m too much of a clever cloggs. Sorry again
*one’s, sorry I like to correct people who like to correct others
acting like a dick isn’t gonna make yours any bigger
Great comeback awesome
Noice
NICE DUDE
That was a good comeback I’m gonna say that to some people that r sooooo annoying only bc I dumped this boy his best friend and him decided to be mean to me but I’m not bothered I’m a girl and I’ve floored a boy before so I will floor them if I have to
That happened with me
Lol same
Use this come back if someone is really geeky in videogames: Youve
Earned an achievement! Being A Jerk
what’s a good comeback for a rude ass guy who says shit about a past relationship that I had with one of his best friends?
Try a few of these: https://ishouldhavesaid.net/2014/07/what-to-say-to-someone-who-keeps-bringing-up-your-past/
This sounds like a good one for they guy: You’re like a plunger, you keep bringing up old shit.
huh?
Here’s one: I bet ur ass is jealous of ur mouth cuz of all the shit that’s coming out of it
Used that one a few times.
same
THAT MY SIGNATURE ONE!GIVE IT BACK!!
Ya know you don’t own it right?
If ur in 5th grade and someone is making fun of u and their breath stinks u should say ur breath so hot the fire men couldn’t put it out. And another one is ur mama so fat when she stepped on the scale u saw her phone number
Good one
Everyone knows that one though
There this kid that is really toxic to me when I play tennis. He says that I hit really weak, but I’m 10 and I can hit 50 mph. He says he wants me to “challenge” him. Keep in mind, he can’t even hit a ball. Anyways, my comeback was, “the only challenge you’re going to have, is to get the ball out of your face when this ball gets stuck in there”. That shut him up for quite a while.
if somebody is talking crap about you say, “i wish i could make you uglier but nature already did it for me.” OR “were you born on a highway because that is were most accidents happen.” OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH they are going to need some ice for that burn.
Hey II think ur butt is supposed to belong on ur rear end not ur face
Shots fired
Just say other end!
I did the accident one in 4th grade, Luckily our art teacher would never tell the principal.
Here is one for people who don’t think. You’ve got two brain cells, ones in a wheelchair, the others pushing.
I say what language are you talking cause it sounds like bullshit.
You should donate some body parts, I hear that they are looking for assholes.
If I was a bird, I know who I’d shit on.
That fire
here iis one: i would roast you but my mom said i can’t burn trash
Say you’re multi-talented, annoying and irritating at the same time.
Omg love it
Shots fired
I know life gives me surprises but your stupidity is the biggest surprise I ever got!
Shut up bitch
That is soooo FUNNY ?!!!
I’d give I you a nasty look but you all ready got one!
Do you remember that time you actually shut that hole if yours in your mouth? me neither!!
If you think throwing stick and stones wil do you any good your even thicker than I thoght
If someone says your ugly say Great Looks like we have something in common
Keep rolling your eyes. Who knows, maybe you’ll find a brain back there.
Or if you want my comeback wipe it off your moms chin
Someone said I know nothing I just thought of it but I would say thanks but I’m looking at somebody way dumber at least we have something in common
I got one… ur birth certificate is an apology letter from a condom factory
ohhhhhhhh Burn! For fun (it’s not a roast) I say:” You were fired so you got burnt and now you’re roasted.”
Here’s one for that friend that stabs you in the back – Someday you’ll go far- Please stay there
Maybe you should eat you makeup so you pretty on the inside
You are even more annoying than the paul brothers.
Your family tree must be a cactus because everyone on it is a PRICK! ( for some asshole out there)
if your gonna be such a two faced jerk at least make one of them prettier
I would just say; Wow, you just won first prize for The Biggest Idiot On the Planet, but I don’t think anyone would want to take the time to write an article about it.
I told that for my sister to shut up but SHE TOLD MY MOM I MEAN!!!!!