What to say when someone is MANIPULATING YOU

Manipulators achieve their goals by persuading others to do what they want by indirectly influencing someone else’s behavior or actions to suit their agenda. At first, they may appear to have your best interests at heart, but really it’s all about them.

They know how to find your weaknesses, and once discovered they will continue to use your weaknesses against you. When they have figured out how to get you to do what they want, they will keep exploiting you until you put a stop to it.

A manipulative high school girl was constantly creating drama with friends. Sonja always wanted to be the centre of attention. She badmouthed other girls in the group behind their backs and turned friends against each other. One day when Sonja wasn’t around, the group started comparing stories and shared horrible things that she had said about every single one of them. They realized she had played and manipulated every single member of the group.

A manipulative person can take a real toll on your life. Here are a few snappy comebacks you can say to let the manipulator know you are on to them.


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Top ten comebacks for manipulative people

1. If I was meant to be controlled I’d come with a remote.

2. Please don’t ask me again. I told you last time that I don’t feel comfortable with X.

3. I have a personal policy of not doing X.

4. Your actions clearly show you have your best interests at heart, not mine.

5. Using manipulative behaviour to get your own way, will only force me to make choices you are not going to like.

6. Arguing with a manipulator is like getting arrested, everything you say or do can be used against you.

7. Do you need some sun because your behaviour is pretty shady?

8. Please don’t ask me again. I told you last time that I don’t feel comfortable with X.

9. I have a personal policy of not doing X.

10. If I was meant to be controlled I’d come with a remote.

11. If you put in as much effort into being a good person as you do pretending to be a good person, you could actually be a good person.

Definition of a manipulative person

A manipulative person is someone who controls and influences the actions of others for their own advantage. They’re knowledgeable in the art of manipulation, with strong tactics such as blaming, gaslighting, and other emotional blackmail.

What this canny person does is inflict as much psychological damage on the others in order to get what they want. They’ll push their victims into isolation, cutting them off from their support system.

Yup, it’s very emotionally draining to be around a good-for-nothing schemer. If you don’t put boundaries to protect yourself, they’ll make you doubt your own reality.

How to deal with a manipulative person

It’s hard to outsmart a crafty individual. In most cases, you’ll end up getting the short end of the stick.

But perhaps with these winning tips you might stand a chance against a manipulative fellow.

1.      Recognize the behaviour

The first move is to spot the behavior of the manipulative person. You can’t protect yourself from something you’re not aware of, correct?

So, see through their games and be aware of their manipulation tactics.

2.      Set boundaries with manipulative people

Remember what we said about protecting yourself? You can do so by setting some boundaries.

You can control how you respond to a manipulative person. You can limit your engagements with them or don’t converse with them at all.

3.      Communicate assertively

When you’re communicating with a manipulative person, you’ve got to be firm and show confidence.

Be clear about what you want and your boundaries. And don’t forget to use “I” to express strongly how disturbing their actions are to you.

4.      Seek support

You need a strong and positive support system when dealing with manipulative attacks. They’ll be your source of encouragement and willpower when you’ve completely run out.

However, if things are getting serious, don’t hesitate to reach out to a therapist or a counselor.

5.      Document the behaviour

You don’t know what to expect from a conniving person. With them, situations can go from bad to worse in an instant.

So, it’s necessary to keep tabs on their behavior. You can keep a record of conversations that’ll be handy in seeking legal action if it comes to that.

At times, manipulators don’t realize that they’re behaving manipulatively. So, they’ll probably keep doing what they do and act against your interests to get what they want.

This being the case, it’s your responsibility to maintain personal limits and look out for yourself.

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Be prepared for a manipulative person

If you have to deal with a manipulative person who gives you a hard time, our Bundle Snappy Comebacks any Situation can help you out. Be prepared for difficult people with clever responses on your phone or device any time or anywhere.

Snappy comebacks for all situations

What to say to MANIPULATIVE people

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Famous people accused of being manipulative

Half the time manipulators don’t realize they’re being manipulative. The same thing can be said for these famous people on this list, who probably don’t know they’re excellent at scheming.

 1.      Harvey Weinstein

The name Harvey Weinstein upsets tons of famous people. The former Hollywood producer used his money and power to sexually harass so many female celebrities.

2.      Taylor Swift

Taylor Swift is America’s sweetheart. But amidst a can’t-do-no-wrong façade, the popstar has a way of controlling the narrative to boost her career and personal life.

3.      Lance Armstrong

Gone are the days when fans used to cheer for Lance Armstrong. Now, the former cyclist is at the other end of the spectrum accused of being a master manipulator.

He allegedly manipulated his teammates and then went on to use performance-enhancing drugs.

 4.      Martha Stewart

Martha Stewart has put her famous name to use, not for the greater good but to manipulate others.

The rumor mill says that the TV personality leveraged her influence to give her business an unfair advantage. Shame on her?

5.      Kevin Spacey

Kevin Spacey had a fall from grace, with sex assault charges attached to his name.

As the infamous story goes, the American actor used his status to intimidate younger actors into doing his bidding. And has gotten away with it, many times over.

Manipulating others is never a good thing, we all know that. But as we mentioned, some people don’t actually realize they’re doing it, until you confront them about it.

So, rather than accusing people of being manipulators, the best thing to do first is to communicate with them. Who knows, maybe that pep talk will be their eye-opener?

The Role of counselling and self care

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When you are dealing with someone who manipulates you and you find it stressful, consider getting support from a professional. Talking to a counselor is a great way to work through a challenging situation, and help you find some strategies to work through the person’s behaviour.

Better Help is a great resource where you can talk to a counselor from the comfort of your own home.

Taking care of your own needs isn’t selfish, and you will feel better in the long run.

Check out what to say to someone who is trying to manipulate you

Got any comments, questions or tips for dealing with manipulative people? Share them in the comments below.

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