Narcissists can be difficult people to deal with. It‘s all about them, all the time. They never think of others. It can be painful if you have a narcissist in your life who constantly tramples on your feelings.
Valerie’s cousin, Olivia, who lived in Ireland, had always been self-centred. Val had secretly thought that she was a narcissist after witnessing selfish behaviour for years.
Val was going through a really tough time in her personal life. Her first serious relationship was over. Her boyfriend, whom she had lived with, left her, and she found out that he was seeing another woman behind her back. In his belongings, she found an 8 inch by 11 inch picture of a woman with a big hook nose, who had written on the picture, “To the sweetest man I have ever known.” Val was devastated both by the break up and by the betrayal and could not stop crying.
Olivia had planned to visit and was meeting a guy she met online in London. When she arrived, Val was still feeling very distraught and could not stop crying that her relationship was over.
Olivia did not have any empathy for Val’s situation and could not understand why she was feeling down and wasn’t super sparkly. Olivia said to Val, “Are you just jealous because I have a date?” Val couldn’t believe that her narcissistic cousin could make the worst moment of her life all about her.
If someone keeps ignoring your feelings and making everything about them, you might want to consider making a few changes in the relationship. Here are a few things to say if you get fed up with the narcissist in your life.
Top ten comebacks for a narcissist
- If you live your life like everything is about you. You will be left with just that. Just you.
- I’m not an astronomer but I am pretty sure the earth revolves around the sun and not you.
- I’m sorry, I forgot I only exist when you want something.
- Sorry, you’re mad that the world doesn’t revolve around you. Let me pour you a tall glass of get over it.
- Thank you for reminding me of how self centered and hypocritical you are. I had almost forgotten.
- Sorry, my self-absorption got in the way of yours.
- Your problem is not knowing you’re the problem.
- There is not a sponge in the world that can rival your self-absorption.
- Get over yourself, not everyone wants to be you.
- Oh yes, let’s ignore everything I just said and talk some more about you.
Definition of a narcissist
A narcissist is an individual who thinks highly of themselves and is in desperate need of admiration. These people will overblow their abilities just to get that attention and love from the masses.
And because they’re technically self-centered, they couldn’t care less about you. They can’t show feelings or sympathy to anyone.
Being a narcissist sounds really bad — because it is. You see, narcissism is a mental health condition and a personality disorder wherein a person becomes unreasonable and has a high sense of importance.
It’s a real problem that may be too hard to control, hence, the need for a mental health professional.
When a narcissist ignores your feelings
When a narcissist ignores your feelings, it can be beyond hurtful and frustrating. The majority of narcissists tend to be selfish and lack empathy, which means they may not be able to understand or care about how their behaviour affects those around them.
You won’t be able to to change a narcissist’s behaviour, and trying to do so may only lead to years of disappointment and frustration. Instead, start to focus on your own well-being, make yourself a priority and set clear boundaries to protect yourself from their behaviour.
One way to cope with a narcissist who ignores your feelings is to start to communicate your own needs assertively and clearly. Let the individual know that their behavior is affecting you in a negative way, and what you need from them in order to feel respected and valued. However, it’s important to be realistic about the likelihood of them changing their behavior.
Try seeking support from your friends and family, or a therapist who can provide a safe and empathetic space to process your feelings. Remember, you deserve to be treated with respect and kindness, and it’s okay to prioritize your own well-being over trying to please someone who consistently ignores your feelings.
How to deal with a narcissist
If you are dealing with a narcissistic person right now, here are some tips that may help:
1. Set boundaries with a narcissist
When we say that a narcissist doesn’t care, we mean they’ll easily cross the boundaries you erected. That’s why you should keep yours strong and steady.
You also may want to identify the things that “you can” and “cannot stand.” The point is to stand up for yourself in dealing with situations such as this one.
2. Don’t engage in arguments
A narcissist read through your emotional response. It fires them up when they see you hurt or angry.
Instead of engaging in an argument with them, try to steer the conversation to the situation at hand. The point is to not allow the narcissist to dominate the conversation.
3. Don’t take their behavior personally
Keep in mind that a narcissist’s behavior is a reflection of their own insecurities and personal issues. It has nothing to do with you. Therefore, you don’t have to take by heart whatever it is that comes out of their mouth.
4. Seek support
When everything seems so dark, you have to bring in some light. That light is the positive people in your life who can give you endless love and support
Anyhow, if the narcissist’s behavior is too much to handle for you, you can always seek professional help.
5. Consider ending the relationship
If a relationship is burning you out, physically and mentally, it’s not a shame to walk away from it.
Taking care of your mental health and well-being is something to prioritize above anything else.
Sheree Griffin once quoted saying that “Narcissistic love is riding on the rollercoaster of disaster.”
And she has perfectly encapsulated the experience of being around a narcissist. It gets you screaming and possibly in tears. You’re going to have to be resilient in dealing with them. Also, you need to fill yourself with “self-love.”
More posts you might like
- Top ten comebacks for for frenemies
- Top ten comebacks for haters
- Check out with our top ten comeback lists
Famous people called a narcissist in the media
Below, we’ve gathered some famous people who are proclaimed by the media as “narcissists.”
1. Kanye West
Kanye West loves to give his opinions, even when they’re unwanted. He had the tendency to inflate statements and eat up the entire conversation — at least that’s how he is in public.
2. Donald Trump
So, they say you don’t need to meet Donald Trump to know he’s a narcissist. Even in public, the former American President has shown his bullying nature.
In fact, during debates, Trump was often domineering and talking down on people. If he doesn’t like what he sees, you’re out the door with zero empathy.
Narcissism wrapped in plastic, that’s how the media perceive Madonna these days. The music icon is often accused of being demanding and self-absorbed. She continuously used her sexuality to boost and control her image.
Look Madonna is a global phenomenon. Perhaps, her behavior is a by-product of her massive success?
4. Justin Bieber
Bieber fever! At a very young age, Justin Bieber experienced incredible fame. But along with that power and money came his narcissistic streak.
JB was called out in the media for his inflated sense of self-importance. Then, there’s also the matter of getting into conversations that have nothing to do with him.
If you’ve been around or in a relationship with a narcissist, you know how hard it is. A narcissist is addicted to always being the most important person in the room.
This behavior can bring tons of stressors into your life, factors that will leave you depleted.
While it’s great of you to have stuck with them all these years, you also have to value yourself.
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The role of counselling and self-care
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When you are dealing with someone narcissistic tendencies that can be difficult people to deal with and you find it stressful, consider getting support from a professional. Talking to a counselor is a great way to work through a challenging situation, and help you find some strategies to work through the person’s behaviour.
Better Help is a great resource where you can talk to a counselor from the comfort of your own home.
Taking care of your own needs isn’t selfish, and you will feel better in the long run.