We all know someone who appears to be your friend and who smiles at you and then delivers a zinger of an insult, leaving you speechless. What’s even worse is they do it every time you see them, leaving you feeling ambushed once again by a nasty remark.
Jackson was sitting quietly in math class when the class idiot came up, put his arm around his shoulder, and called him, “my cabrone.” Connor meant to say, “my bitch” only his Spanish wasn’t so hot, and he ended up saying, “my asshole.”
Connor had embarrassed Jackson before, so this time he was ready. Jackson had four comebacks on the top of his tongue, and he said a few in front of the entire class. Everyone cracked up laughing at Connor’s expense, and he never bothered Jackson again.

WANT TO BE ABLE TO SPEAK UP FOR YOURSELF?
Our FREE Starter Guide will show you the 3 simple steps you can take right now to stand up for yourself so that you can feel confident. It’s a game changer–get it free for a limited time!
These top ten comebacks for verbal bullies will let the person know that underneath their shiny facade, you know that their comments are truly rotten. Check out some great comebacks now, and you will be armed to talk back next time an idiot makes a mean comment.
Remember, it’s not what you say but how you say it. It’s best to deliver these snappy remarks with a smile on your face.
Top Ten Comebacks for Verbal Bullies
- Wow, that almost hurt my feelings.
- If you can’t be kind, be quiet.
- OK, that’s enough sarcasm for one day.
- What you said was mean spirited and untrue.
- If your goal was to be hurtful, mission accomplished.
- It’s not okay for you to comment on X.
- Where’s your off button?
- Do you always mask insults with humour?
- You realize you said that out loud, right?
- I don’t know how to say this nicely, so I won’t.
More top ten comeback lists you might like

WANT TO BE ABLE TO SPEAK UP FOR YOURSELF?
Our FREE Starter Guide will show you the 3 simple steps you can take right now to stand up for yourself so that you can feel confident. It’s a game changer–get it free for a limited time!
Donald Trump Verbally Bullies Rosie O’Donnell on Twitter

Donald Trump and Rosie O’Donnell have been feuding for years. Both are known to be argumentative and engage in spats. Both are rich and powerful, it is hard to believe that they really don’t have better things to do with their time!
Trump has brutally insulted Rosie publicly in his tweets. Sure, you may think thinks bad thoughts about somebody but do you really need to say this to the entire world?
Rosie is crude, rude, obnoxious and dumb – other than that I like her very much! — Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) – 11 Jul 2014
I feel sorry for Rosie ‘s new partner in love whose partner in love whose parents are devastated at the thought of their daughter being with @Rosie–a true loser. — Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) December 14, 2011
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) 14 Dec, 2011
24 Responses
I think this is excellent adcvie. I do agree that usually, completely ignoring the bully works, but as you say if there is anything physical, or threat of physical violence, you should tell an adult. Great article!
Thank you this solved my bully problem
I usually use this one: Does your ass ever get jealous of how much shit comes out of your mouth?
I have another “your dick is supposed to be in your pants not in your personality”.
lol that one would shut someone up fast and get laughs
I did that one on a girl but I said “you dick belongs in your pants not your personality and before you say you don’t have a dick, go and grow a pair cuz there is something disgusting popping out of your personality
Nikki, what did the girl do when you said that to her? Was she shocked?
oh my gosh love it
I have one ” Just because you don’t have a dick, doesn’t mean you have to act like one.”
Thanks so much for making this. I constantly get insulted by people. So this I perfect. I’m gonna recommend
Hi Hannah,
I am glad that you like the site and that it is helping you out. A lot of kids say that once they deliver a few great comebacks, all of a sudden people stop picking on them. Bullies often pick on people they think won’t respond.
If someone is continuously picking on you, it would be a great idea to tell an adult. Sometimes things can be challenging for kids to figure out.
Let me know if you ever need help with a comeback.
Bryn
What is a good comeback for parents who seem to “pick” on the oldest kid? It happens to me ALL the time.
Hi Caleb,
I hear and you and I will work on a post for you.
Bryn
GOOD COMEBACK: Huh? What did you just say? Oh, sorry I can’t understand you I don’t speak bitch!
I have one:oh so I’m invisible now am I? Cool I’ve always wanted a superpower
That’s if u get ignored
Here’s another : “if this is the only thing you have to do in life you have one bad life jeez “
dude say “your like pampers,self absorbed and full of shit”
Where were you years ago?
DOESN’T matter youre here NOW! Tonight ended with a horrendous fight with a toxic friend. She said some horrible things to which I am going to respond but wanted just the right words…so I started googling…
And lookey here….what did I find…YOUR PAGE!
Take a bow! GREAT JOB!!
Reada
Lmao I got one. “I’m trying to see things from your point of view… but I just can get my head that far up my ass!” TYSM for the comebacks btw!
Being a dick won’t make yours any bigger.
Thanks! I’m at a new school and this really helped!
one time i was arguing with my brother about something and he said “If you answer, it means you heard it!” and i just said: “Huh?” and my mom laughed until she cried. it was hilarious.
That’s a good one