No matter what the circumstances are, there are always people who blame others whenever anything doesn’t go their way. Blamers are incapable of accepting responsibility for their actions or for being part of the problem. The only thing that they are concerned about is condemning someone else and pointing out what they did wrong.
Blamers truly believe that they have never done anything wrong. They see themselves as the victim in the situation, no matter what the reality is, and it is always someone else’s fault. The problem with blaming things outside of yourself is that things can never get better in your life because you need someone else to change before your situation can improve.
Jasmine blamed her parents for her weight problems. As a child, they let her eat rubbish food. At 29, Jasmine was in control of the food she shoved into her mouth, but she still blamed her parents for her eating problem. She couldn’t solve the problem or shed the 50 pounds she needed to lose.
Jasmine needed to be accountable for her actions and eat less. Blaming her parents would never lead to actual weight loss.
If you get tired of the blaming behavior, here are some clever comebacks you can say to get your message across loud and clear.
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Top Ten Comebacks for a Blamer
1. You can’t improve your life when you blame other people for your problems. That would mean everyone else would have to change for your life to get better.
2. No one is coming to save you. This life of yours is 100% your responsibility.
3. You need to take more responsibility for yourself.
4. When you blame others you give up your power to grow.
5. Some people create their own storms and then get upset when it rains.
6. If you’re tired of drama in your life, just quit being the actor.
7. You give yourself credit for your happiness and accomplishments, yet you have a list of people to blame for your bitterness and failures.
8. When people point fingers at others they should remember that they have four fingers pointing back at them.
9. It is always easier to blame others, you can spend your entire life blaming the world but your success and failures are entirely your responsibility.
10. If everywhere you go there’s a problem. Guess what?
WANT TO BE ABLE TO SPEAK UP FOR YOURSELF?
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Definition of a blamer
A blamer is someone who always seems to point the finger at others instead of taking responsibility for their own mistakes or problems. They are quick to blame others instead of taking responsibility for their actions. The act of pointing fingers can have major consequences, including the destruction of relationships, the loss of trust, and even legal or ethical issues.
How to deal with a blamer
Dealing with a blamer can be a bit tricky, but here are some simple tips that might help you navigate the situation:
- Relax – Our instinct is to get all defensive and fired up, but hold up a second. Take a moment, close your eyes, and take a nice, deep breath. After all, whatever they say won’t generally define us.
- Be a listener – It’s so important to let other people talk about how they feel. People just need to let it all out sometimes. So, try to really listen to what people are saying and don’t cut them off.
- Don’t let it get to you – Stay calm and remember that it says more about them than it does about you. Don’t take what they say to heart. It’s not something to get upset about.
- Be confident – If someone is blaming you unfairly, it’s time to find your inner fighter and speak up! It’s all about being strong and polite when you talk, and not letting other people walk all over you.
- Focus on Solutions – It’s important to reflect on what went down and figure out how you can work together to prevent it from happening again. Because let’s be real, nobody wants a repeat of a mess.
- Put limits in place – You have the power to establish clear boundaries with these blamers. It’s time to take control of the situation and protect your peace of mind. Be firm and assertive, but also respectful.
Don’t forget that you can’t always control how other people act, but you can control how you react. So, keep calm and think positively! Trust me, staying calm and upbeat is the key!
More top ten comeback lists you might like
- When someone hurts you but blames you: Understanding emotional abuse
- Don’t put the blame on me: Personal responsibility in relationships
- Top ten comebacks for complainers
- Top ten comebacks for judgmental people
Famous people who blame others
Here are a few well-known people who have been known to point the finger at others. Keep in mind, though, that people can change, and that these events might not tell you everything about them:
- Lindsay Lohan – So, this actress and singer has had her fair share of troubles. And she’s often blamed things like the pressures of fame or the people around her.
- Charlie Sheen – This guy is quite the character, known for his larger-than-life personality. He is always blaming others for his strange behavior and drug problems.
- Donald Trump – The former U.S. President had a real knack for pointing fingers whenever things didn’t go his way. Whenever there was an issue, he was quick to blame his opponents or even the media.
- Kanye West – This rapper-turned-fashion designer has a knack for pointing fingers and shifting blame when things don’t go his way. He is always making headlines with his wild outbursts and controversies.
- Lance Armstrong – The former professional cyclist has been accused of not taking responsibility for his actions. Instead blaming others for his use of performance-enhancing drugs and the court problems that followed.
It’s no secret that being in the spotlight can be tough and so it’s the celebrities’ way of coping with all the expectations and hardships that come their way. Let’s try to look at those situations with a lot of understanding and an open mind. Who knows, maybe there’s more to the story than meets the eye.
Be prepared next time you have to deal with a blamer
If you have to deal with someone who blames you for everything and who gives you a hard time, our bundle Snappy Comebacks any Situation can help you out. Be prepared for difficult people with clever responses on your phone or device any time or anywhere.
The Role of counselling and self care
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When you are dealing with a blamer and you find it stressful, consider getting support from a professional. Talking to a counselor is a great way to work through a challenging situation, and help you find some strategies to work through the person’s behaviour.
Better Help is a great resource where you can talk to a counselor from the comfort of your own home.
Taking care of your own needs isn’t selfish, and you will feel better in the long run.
HoW BOUT nothing ever goes away until it teaches us what we need to know.
Blaming other people is great, until you’ve got nobody left around to blame but yourself. I like to say this to lazy nephew who blames the world for his problems.
My friend is always blaming people for her shit. Someone said you play the victim so well, I am surprised you dont’ carry around your own body chalk. She didn’t like that!
LOL: Yeah, its totally realistic to think its everyone else…when your dumb ass is the common denominator in every situation!
I have this person in my school, she is such a minipulative uggghhhh! And she is like after me… She has been for the last 3-4 years. She stole my best friend and made her turn on me just cuz she was jealous of our friendship cuz she wanted it for herself. She also stole 4 other friends of mom and yet again….. Made them turn on me, also they stick up for her the minute she gets blamed for anything…. For e.g. She said to my ex-best friend that I was a bitch and I asked her why she said that and the minute I asked her the 4 girls, the minipulative girl and my ex-best friend was like “WHAT????? YOU LIAR!!! YOUR LYINGGGG!!!! YOUR JUST OUT TO GET US OMFG GO AWAY!!!” And then the minipulative one started fake crying………….. The teacher or out mums CANNOT sort this out what so ever…. Plz help with a comeback extreme for this argument
Of mine yet again**
Not mom yet again lol
Hi,
I really feel for you, there is nothing worse than dealing with a manipulative person. Sometimes these kind of kids fool parents and teachers into thinking they are good kids, when they are really downright nasty.
She sounds like the kind of person who stirs up trouble and then plays the victim, so you have be careful what you say. I have given you a couple of comebacks below to deflect her because she sounds like she wants you engage and then look like the bad guy who started it. Don’t fall for it. If you deflect her, and don’t engage, she may move on to someone else and leave you alone. These are also comebacks you can use at school and a teacher can’t call you on.
We have seen this kind of situation before, and the troublemaker is eventually exposed for who they truly are.
Our top ten lists https://ishouldhavesaid.net/top-ten/ also include a lot of good comebacks.
Practice saying the comebacks at home so you are ready next time she says something to you.
Just remember that better times await you and this won’t last forever.
Bryn
hmm, maybe you should say life is good you should get one, and also say “oh one last thing your new “bff” creates a storm but gets upset when it rains
hey i totally understand this conversation I don’t have a comeback but can understand and hope this conversation gets better.And am sending you luck!
Say this well done you have just achieved utter bitchyness now live your life for real and not talk bullshit
I have the same problem mate. This guy is such a bastard, he acts all polite to the teachers, helping them and asking how their day was. Then he goes and bully’s everyone else, but st the same time impressing th girls and being all ‘charming’. We were learning how to cook piella at schools and oil (just a drop) sprays into his eye. He blames me and starts being really nasty and talks about me behind my back. I call him a disgusting human being, but that’s it. 5 minutes later he asks if we can be friends and I say no. People like that are ruining the world. Good luck, I hope you defeat the bully and have a successful school life.
If someone looks at you and screams “MY EYES IT BURNS” Just say “Oh yeah sorry my skin is so clear you saw your own reflection yeah soz mate
Honestly, the manipulation, need for control, lack of empathy, and everything else you just described about this girl–she sounds like a full blown “Psychopath” who needs a professional behavioral therapist to work with. She’s the kind of person who will turn everyone against you and steal your sunshine instead of being happy for you-that’s not a true friend– those are the symptoms of a point blank psychopath! Danger! It’s not you honey, it’s a reflection of her lower self worth in the world that she has to tear other people down in order to build herself up and feel in control. (I major in behavioral psychology). Hmm, I wonder if her parents are ever there for her? Divorced? Fight all the time? Cheating? Irrational behaviors like that usually reflect the parents.** Figuring people out and holding their feet to the fire by giving them the truth is the best comeback. I’d send this girl a referral to see a psychiatrist.
Hello. I have recently replied to this comment, as I have had the exact same problem. The guy I’m dealing with has been beaten by a parent. Maybe that is why he is like that. I don’t know but he is a disgusting human being.
I understand you. It’s happening to me, too! Some girl in my school turned all my friends against me because I have done this in 5ith grade. It’s not even true! Only one friend stayed with me, and I realised that she was my only true friend, and I prefer her as more than a hundred fake friends – I told her that, and she doesn’t bully me that much anymore.
I hope you defeat her and understand what true friends are and be happy in life. True friends don’t turn against you just because some other girl said so.
p.s. pleas don’t maind my bead english I am not from amerika or england so I had to use google translete
This is good advice
Try pointing at their foot and say “uh your monster is showing”
Or
“Any attempt to diminish myself or my character will result in direct violation of natural law”