How to respond when someone asks why you won't have sex with them

If you are really attractive, chances are you probably get hit on a lot by members of the opposite sex. Guaranteed, there is going to be someone who wants to hook up with you and will want to know why you are not into them.

They may wonder why you won’t give them a chance, the thing is the attraction has to be a two-way street. Having chemistry with someone is not something that can be faked or changed, it just is. When people have chemistry together they both feel it.

Men also can’t expect to walk up to a girl and tap her on the head and have her knickers fall off! Romance usually takes a little bit of warming up.


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When someone wants to know why you won’t hook up with them, use one of our clever comebacks below.

10 Best comebacks when someone wants to know why you won’t hook up with them

1. I think we should be friends with sexual tension.

2. I am not that desperate and you are not that lucky.

3. Naw, I don’t need cable.

4. Thanks, I’m not looking for one night stands at this stage of my life.

5. I don’t have hook ups on days that end in y.

6. I’m allergic to awkward situations, so I’ll have to pass.

7. I would rather organize my sock drawer than hook up with you.

8. I’m in training to become a celibate monk, thanks anyway.

9. If only I hadn’t signed up to be a nun.

10. Do you really expect me to answer that question.

Definition of a hook up

A hook up typically refers to a casual sexual encounter between two consenting individuals, often with no expectation of a committed relationship or long term emotional attachment.

The term is commonly used to describe a one-time or one night stand which may occur between strangers, friends for sexual gratification and not an emotional relationship.

It is important to note that the specific understanding and implications of the term “hook up” can vary based on cultural, social, and individual perspectives.

How to deal with someone who wants to hook up with you

If someone expresses an interest in hooking up with them you need to set some pretty clear boundaries in an assertive way.

Politely and firmly let the individual know if you’re not interested and explain why it’s not gong to happen.

Stand your ground and prioritize your own needs. If the person continues to pressure or perusal after you have said no, you may want to distance yourself and let others know what is going on. You always have the right to say to someone.

When life screws you over
when someone won't have sex with you

More snappy comebacks you might like

Sophia had to turn down the guy who wanted to hook up

Sophia walked into the club, excited to let loose and have a good time with her friends. As she made her way to the dance floor, a guy approached her with a confident smile. He tried to strike up a conversation and made it clear that he was interested in hooking up with her.

Sophia politely declined his advances, explaining that she was just there to have fun with her friends. The guy’s smile faded, and his friendly demeanor turned into anger. He couldn’t believe that she would reject him and began to act aggressively, raising his voice and making a scene.

Sophia remained calm and composed, refusing to be intimidated by his behavior. She stood her ground and firmly reiterated her decision. The guy eventually stormed off in frustration, and Sophia continued to enjoy her night without letting his reaction ruin her experience.

Despite the encounter, Sophia didn’t let the guy’s anger affect her. She danced, laughed, and made unforgettable memories with her friends, knowing that she had the right to make choices for herself and that no one had the right to pressure her into anything she didn’t want.

The Role of counselling and self care

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When you are dealing with someone who pressures you to have sex and you find it stressful, consider getting support from a professional. Talking to a counsellor is a great way to work through a challenging situation, and help you find some strategies to work through the person’s behaviour.

Better Help is a great resource where you can talk to a counselor from the comfort of your own home. 

Taking care of your own needs isn’t selfish, and you will feel better in the long run.

Got any comments, questions or tips for dealing with someone who asks ‘Why won’t you hook up with me?’ Share them in the comments below.

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