Funny replies when people ask why you DON'T HAVE KIDS

If you are a couple, at some point in time someone is going to ask you when you are going to have kids. If you have just met someone and you are still figuring out your relationship, it can be embarrassing to be put on the spot. You are probably still figuring out if the person is the one for you, without adding another person into the mix.

Not everyone wants children, when you think that you are signing up to move in with someone you don’t know for the next 18 years, it’s a pretty big deal.

Next time some nosy person wants to know when you are having children, smile and use one of our clever comebacks.

Go ahead and tell us what you think is the best comeback by leaving comment below.

10 Best comebacks when people ask when you are going to have kids

1. I love children… medium rare with fettucini.

2. My private parts are for recreational use only.

3. Just because I have a uterus, doesn’t mean I want a baby in it.

4. I can’t bear children.

5. No, we don’t have children. We child proofed the house years ago and they haven’t been able to get in since.

6. To be honest we’re still trying to figure out how to keep our houseplants alive.

7. We’re still perfecting our mom jeans and dad jokes.

8. We’re still debating who would change the diapers. Would you be willing to do diaper duty for us?

9. We’re pretty happy with our current life.

10. There is no need to rush such an important decision.


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Why do people ask why don’t you have children?

People often ask about when someone is planning to have kids out of a genuine interest in their lives and a desire to connect with them on a personal level. In many cultures, starting a family is considered a significant milestone, and people may inquire about it as a way to show support and express excitement for the future.

We need to recognize that these questions can also be intrusive and sensitive, as they touch upon deeply personal matters. While some individuals may ask out of genuine curiosity and care, others may not realize the potential impact of their inquiries. Understanding and respecting each person’s unique circumstances and choices is crucial when discussing topics related to family planning.

More Snappy comebacks you might like

How to deal with people who ask why don’t you have children

When people keep asking why you don’t have children, it’s important to respond in a way that is comfortable for you while being respectful of the other person. Here are some strategies for handling such questions:

1. Boundary up: Politely let the person know that your reproductive choices are a personal matter and the topic is not up for discussion.

2. Shift the conversation: Redirect the conversation to another topic by steering the conversation in a different direction. For example, you could say, “Tell me about your family and children?”

3. Educate when appropriate: If the person seems genuinely curious and open to understanding different perspectives, you can share your reason for not having kids that may be outside of some people’s world view. For people in certain religions, not having kids is absolutely unacceptable.

4. Respond with humor: Using humor can help deflect the question without causing offense. You could use one of our clever comebacks listed above.

5. Be honest: If you feel comfortable, you can share your personal reasons for not having any children. This can help the other person understand your situation, and stop asking intrusive questions in the future.

Remember that you are never obligated to disclose personal information that you are not comfortable sharing. This is an appropriate time to assert personal boundaries and refuse to answer questions that make you uncomfortable.

comebacks for people who ask if you want kids

Sophia was tired of people asking why she didin’t have kids

Sophia and her partner had been together for several years, and although they were happy with their life, they were constantly bombarded with questions about when they were going to have children.

It seemed like every family gathering or social event turned into an interrogation about their family planning. Sophia felt frustrated and exhausted by the constant pressure from well-meaning friends and family members.

Sophia wished people would understand that starting a family was a deeply personal decision and not something to be prodded and pried about. Despite the external pressure, Sophia and her partner remained united in their resolve to take their time and make the decision that was right for them.

As the inquiries continued, Sophia found herself becoming more and more adept at deflecting the questions with a smile and a vague response. She knew that her and her partner’s family planning was no one else’s business, and she refused to let the constant badgering affect her.

She hoped that eventually, people would realize that their questions were intrusive and unnecessary. In the meantime, Sophia focused on enjoying her life with her partner and building their future together, knowing that when the time was right, they would make the decision to start a family on their own terms.

The Role of counselling and self care

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When you are dealing with a person who asks why you don’t have children and you find it stressful, consider getting support from a professional. Talking to a counselor is a great way to work through a challenging situation, and help you find some strategies to work through the person’s behaviour.

Better Help is a great resource where you can talk to a counselor from the comfort of your own home. 

Taking care of your own needs isn’t selfish, and you will feel better in the long run.

Got any comments, questions or tips for someone who asks why you don’t have children? Share them in the comments below.

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  1. People shouldn’t ask this question. I’ve had three miscarriages and I always feel terrible when people ask.

    1. True. I have lost both my ovaries to cysts and I was crushed. It’s not like I want to be childless. But the ones said “my personal part are for recreational only” is pretty good, I’m going to use that from now on. LOL.

  2. People shouldn’t ask this question because some couples are struggling to get pregnant. In my case is a choise my husband and I don’t want children, but sometimes I have to lied given excuses to family and friends on why we don’t want one. Because most people will never get our choice.

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